Bête Noire recently switched from casual apparel to suiting, gowns, and gothic chic formal wear– founder Alicia Rau’s true passions. We cater to the alternative bride, and pride ourselves in helping you find the perfect black wedding gown. Need a gothic prom dress? We’ve got that covered too. Favor the masculine side of fashion? Don’t fret. Inclusivity is of the utmost importance. We’ll be releasing our line of masculine and gender neutral suiting along with additional sizes this September.

You can ask anyone I was around growing up. There was no question what I wanted to be. A designer. I directly credit my mother and grandmother. Both strong, classy, creative women who were talented seamstresses. It started with costumes. Halloween was always the best day of the year, and there were never boundaries to what I wanted to craft. Somehow they managed to always bring my creation to life.

Having a solid foundation, when I got old enough I decided to go for it. Armed with a arsenal of formal gown designs, I was accepted into the Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising and I moved to Los Angeles. This story doesn’t go the way you think, though.

The next decade consisted of abusive relationships, alcoholism, and overcoming heart breaking traumas mostly inflicted by myself. If you had asked me my dream job then, without a doubt I still would have responded fashion design. Never in a million years did I ever think that was actually achievable.

At 27 I got sober, met my twin flame, and did all the “normal life” things society praises. Getting married, starting a family, and supporting my husband into an incredible career. I still didn’t feel complete.

In 2013 my grandpa Leonard fell ill. He was unable to return to his senior apartment and entered a nursing home. Always having had a connection to the older generation, I went to visit right away. I didn’t find the ultra-strong man I remembered growing up. Not only was he unwell, I immediately picked up on the sign of nursing home abuse. The way I was raised, family always comes first. I took it upon myself to find him a new home. I also knew it didn’t stop there.

This is the part that always chokes me up. The next years were spent with daily visits, laughter, and listening to the incredible stories of my Grandfathers past. We grew close to the staff and other residents and were a big family. If I could get those years back, I would no question.

When my Grandpa passed away in 2018 – the void I felt was immense. He was my Yoda, and although I’m close to my parents his words seemed to always reach me differently. Being no stranger to darkness I vowed to take my pain and make it beautiful.

It was then I was again asked the burning question “If you could be anything – what would it be?” With my past to guide me, I had no reservations. I realized that the only thing holding me back from accomplishing adding the title of designer to my resume was myself. Just like that, Bête Noire was born.

The funny thing about growth is it never ends. I’m strongly devoted to making progress in all plains of my life. After 2 years in business, I found myself again at a crossroad. Partially fulfilled but exhausted. Exhausted by fast fashion, other’s judgements, social media, you name it. I felt I was always being advised to follow the status quo and that the financial risk was too great to explore the idea of creating formal wear. I told my close circle we would close within the coming months.

Ultimately, closing didn’t feel right, either. Late one evening my husband casually told me, “Bête Noire can and will be whatever you want it to be. Why don’t you do what you’re good at? You make the impossible possible.” It’s funny how if you’re listening – the right people have just the right thing to say at the right time.

This journey in Bete Noire has never been about the followers, profits, or clout. It’s solely based on creating a company and pieces I wish existed. Inclusive and founded on doing the right thing, excellent customer service, and a true knowledge & love for the art of design. It doesn’t matter what happens next. I can say I wake up and have the privilege to do something I’m passionate about.

May this be your reminder that no matter your current path - you can never truly abandon your divine purpose. If you’re not happy, ask yourself the question: “If I could be anything, what would it be?”

Reach for the stars and never, ever give up,